tea with Jesus

        Source: eliseenchanted.deviantart.com via Joye on Pinterest

It wasn't pretty, the scene in my house tonight.  
It was nearly nine o'clock and my kitchen still mocked me with it's dirty dishes stacked on every surface, my house was nearly shouting in disarray.  

I was going through the motions of cleaning, but inside my voice matched the frenzied state of my home.  My whole body was moaning with frustration at the unfairness of motherhood and just life in general.  I didn't take joy in putting my kids to sleep, in fact it's been quite a few weeks since I haven't thought of it as a dreaded chore.  By bedtime, I've spent every last piece of myself.  And now here I was, at my dirty sink, complaining.  Quietly crying tears of self-pity.  Angry with myself for not having it all together, for not being a more grateful, more cheerful, serene, and happy mom.  Absolutely despising myself for yelling at my children, for being too emotional, for not being able to control the chaos of child rearing.

Then there's a knock at my door.
I take a deep breath and answer.

My dear neighbor friends are there, on my doorstep, with a hot teapot and gentle smiles.

"We thought you might like some tea on the porch tonight?"

And just like that, He's there.  Jesus showing up at my weakest moment.  

Reminding me that He still cares, still loves me and always will.   That He will go to such great lengths as invite me to tea, if that's what it takes to reach my heart.

"We hope you like chai."

And my eyes are welling up with tears because it's my favorite and He knew.

He knows me and He loves me.

And in the presence of two of His dearest daughters, I feel Him touch those deep heart wounds that have been crippling my faith and stealing my joy.

We talk and their words are healing.

Lynelle shares her story and I hear God confirming some of mine.

Orissa swirls the tea in her cup as she remembers what someone once shared with her:

We are like fine tea.  Crushed down to the finest grade.  Steeped in boiling water.  And just when the pressure gets the most intense, at that exact moment before the tea turns bitter, we're removed from the heat.  Because God knows how much we can take.  He knows how to bring out our most delicate and sweetest flavor.

We sip quietly in the night air, bruised tea bags not unaccustomed to heat, and Jesus reminds me of the aroma of such a life.  How pleasing the fragrance is to Him.  And I'm humbled and convicted and I remember that "He who promised is faithful".

We pray and I feel a burden lifted.  

I feel my joy being restored.

I feel so very loved.

And sometimes that makes all the difference in the world.


Jesus, thank you for your body, your family loving as you do.   Thank you for the obedience of the daughters you brought to my doorstep.  Thank you for blessing me with this gift of motherhood, this awesome ministry of discipling my children, the love of a good man, and the incredible and unmerited, extravagant love of a Saviour.  I am overwhelmed by the lengths you will go to just to show me how much you care for me.  
Completely yours.